Monday, August 30, 2010

The Meteoric Rise to Not Bad

Cash Johnson once more with even more Blood Bowl sports news.

First, we have the full story on the Reikland Wrath, who are quickly becoming a team to talk about. In a stunning week's performance, they have brought their record to an impressive 3-0 against Ogres and Orcs. The success I have achieved with them in the league thus far is due to my paying fealty to the Chaos Gods - not only did I switch names around to better suit the four sacred numbers, but I made sure that all four numbered players were suitably marked and painted first before all others. It worked. The updated Reikland Wrath lineup after three games:

#1 Blag Dahlia, Team Captain, Warrior - 2 SPP
#2 Kurgan Scalptaker, Warrior - 2 SPP
#3 The Black Duke, Warrior - 2 SPP
#4 Goretusk, Minotaur - 8 SPP, Standard Skills + Claws (dedicated Can Opener)
#5 Abrax the Twisted, Beastman - 5 SPP (MVP on the first game he didn't get KO'd)
#6 Gorruk the Wild, Beastman of Slaanesh - 9 SPP, Horns, Guard
#7 Morgen Grimtusk, Beastman of Nurgle - 5 SPP, Horns
#8 Gathak Bloodhorn, Beastman of Khorne - 8 SPP, Horns, Juggernaut (dedicated Safety)
#9 Volus Raveneye, Beastman of Tzeentch - 4 SPP, Horns
#10 Karthax Ironhoof, Beastman - 6 SPP, Guard, Horns
#11 Kursk Two-Tongue, Beastman - 5 SPP, Horns (dedicated Passer, YES I SAID PASSER)
Additional Staff: Apothecary

So I can already hear gears grinding in the collective virtual head of the readers - why didn't Cash take Block on his Beastmen?! At least, that's what I hear from the old timers every time they see my roster sheet. Sure, Block was great back in the day, but this is a younger man's game now. What good is a skill that only increases my chances of taking a hit by 17% when I could double up on Guard and deny an entire line Assists so I always get two dice my favor when he hits me (because everyone hates a Push when they NEED a Knockdown)? As for Juggernaut, I only get the bonus from Horns on a Blitz anyway, and he IS the favored of Khorne. Obviously it's worked out well for him, having gotten four Casualties, so why not? Between Goretusk, Gorruk, Gathak and Karthax, plus always putting the three warriors on the line, that gives me a seven-man brick wall that still keeps the remaining four beastmen open and on the move. Just because we're Chaos doesn't mean we have to play like it... :D

I wish I could claim the same success with Clan Xymox, who got over their injury streak yesterday. In a series of unfortunate mishaps - Ogres, Orcs, and Khemri respectively - I had a Blitzer miss a game, followed by three Linemen miss a game (resulting in the firing of two of them for optimum performance), then a horrific series of "Miss This Game" while holding off against Tomb Guard. Clan Xymox now stands as follows with a 3-3 record:

#1 Squeak Twitchfoot, Team Captain, Gutter Runner - 13 SPP, Dodge, Leap
#2 Thrak the White, Thrower - 3 SPP, Pass, Sure Hands
#3 Bulk Irontail, Blitzer - 6 SPP, Block, Mighty Blow (seems fitting given his name)
#4 Queeg Blackfur, Blitzer - 0 SPP, Block
#5 Shiv Sneakpaw, Gutter Runner - 7 SPP, Dodge, Sure Hands, MV 8 (dedicated Handoff now)
#6 Titch Redeye, Gutter Runner - 19 SPP, Dodge, Leap, Agility 5 (only fails on a 1 now)
#7 Snag Longsnout, Lineman - 10 SPP, Shadowing (best skill ever for rats)
#8 Ignatz Vilepelt, Lineman - 7 SPP, Tackle (would be better with Shadowing)
#9 Toerag Shorthair II, Lineman - 0 SPP (former Journeyman, permanent Reserve box)
#10 Snog Gnawfang, Lineman - 2 SPP
#11 Blag Warptail II, Lineman - 0 SPP
#12 Nitz Dwarfstab, Lineman - 4 SPP
Additional Staff: Apothecary

I'm not going to lie, I was crushed after I played against Orcs and took a 3 "Miss Next Game" beating, despite the win. The only clear option was to fire #'s 9 and 11 for incompetence, keep Ignatz on the bench since he has a skill, then take a Journeyman and hire a new player, which only cost me 50,000 instead of the full hundred - I decided Loner was a one-game risk I could take against Khemri, and I was right. In a stunning Tomb Guard Blitz, the new #9 was sent careening down the pitch and into the injury pile, where the Apothecary saved him from dying, though now I have the rest of the team back in play, he will only come out when needed.

Moving forward, Shadowing and Tackle will be the plan for Snag and Ignatz, as Wood Elves have now gotten into the league as well. I need to get some Casualties on Queeg since he's done practically nothing since game one. Nitz will be getting Guard at the first opportunity to make the Ratcage more effective when on defense. Right now, I have to make sure Titch doesn't have anything bad happen to him - I feel I am not paying enough homage to the Horned Rat by denying a 13th player into the fold, and he has punished me already with three muggings. Another 60k from winnings and the Rat Ogre will be purchased, I swear it.

- Cash

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